When your child is bullied, do you forgive or encourage him to “beat” back?

When the child is small, so the danger can be screened by mom and dad, but none of us can stop the pace of children grow up, just like can’t stop the four seasons change.

After the child in kindergarten, we can not always pay attention to the child, if bullied, hurt, the teacher did not find in time.

As our children get older, they are more likely to be on the receiving end of bullying, so what do we do? After all, no one wants their child to be roughed up, much less turned into a doormat.

The knee-jerk reaction of many parents may be to call back.

Have to say, this is indeed the most direct and effective way to fight back, but parents have taken into account the following situations:

Whether the child is physically strong enough to beat the opponent. How do children get used to fighting violence with violence, and even take the initiative to provoke others? What if the child is not used to physical confrontation? Simply telling the child to fight back is not an effective way to solve the problem, and parents must not do this when the child is experiencing violence and confiding in their parents:

One, sneer at children

As the saying goes, “bully the soft and fear the hard”, parents think: there are so many people in the school only you are bullied, isn’t it because of your own weakness?

Therefore, when a child tells himself that he is being bullied at school, the parents will often say sarcasm, which will not only hurt the child, the child will not choose to go to the parents for help and talk about similar problems in the future.

Two, indifference to the right

There are also some parents, always intentionally or unintentionally ignore their children’s injuries, and even think that children make a mountain out of a molehill, that should not be cared about.

Parents’ indifferent attitude will also make children feel that no one cares about them. Over time, children are not willing to talk to their parents, and they are not willing to fight back when they are bullied.

Three, let the child meet the difficulties and flee

When a child is being bullied, many parents always try to minimize the incident and calm it down. When the child is bullied to ask for help, let the child to hide away, this will not only let the child down to the parents, but also let the child develop a weak character.

When the child is bullied, parents must comfort, help the child in time, become the child’s solid backing, to teach him to protect himself.

To let the child know, not easy rough is breeding, not afraid of things is also aura.

People’s life is very long, can not always smooth sailing, encounter bullying is also very normal. As parents, it is very important to teach children to cope correctly. Don’t make trouble, don’t be afraid of trouble, don’t attack others actively, is the basic quality of human beings, but never blindly tolerate, this is the bottom line.

Here are some things you can teach your children:

Learn to say no

Teach children to say “no”, in the face of what they don’t want, you can politely refuse, in the face of others’ bad behavior, we should also know how to refuse, in the face of others’ bullying, but also let the child say loudly: please stop, otherwise I will be welcome.

Give your child plenty of support

Children are afraid of violence, and dare not resist, because they think that they do not have the ability to resist, even think that resistance can not bring about any change, so simply give up.

Children do this, to a large extent is caused by lack of security, so parents must stand behind their children, tell their children, a lot of things, may not be able to help you solve, but, we will always support you.

With the support of parents, children have a sense of security and the determination to protect themselves.

Parents can’t protect their children all their lives, only let them really learn to protect themselves is the best protection.

Teach your child to ask for help

If your child is unable to stop the violence on her own, remember to teach her to get help to minimize the harm to herself.

Keeping yourself safe is the most important thing

Parents must tell their children that you can do everything to protect yourself from violence. You can say “no” loudly, you can ask teachers, the police, parents for help, you can run away… Whatever you do, make sure you’re safe first and then get to the root of the problem.

The damage depends on how the child feels

The real victims of school violence are children, so parents should not judge the size of the matter from their own point of view, nor choose to forgive or blame for the children, you can give advice to the children but also accept the children’s decision.

This is the right way to let the child become brave, blindly help him to think of ways, for his advice, the child will never learn to think and solve things independently.

If you want to prevent your child from being bullied and despised, and also do not want your child to become a person who is accustomed to using violence to solve problems, it is necessary to actively cultivate children’s independent personality, and help them build self-confidence and sense of security.

Teach children not to easily bully others, also can not be bullied, once found children become the object of bullying, to timely to channel the child’s inner resentment, teach children to establish self-protection awareness, and carry out the right counterattack.