“See the wrong problem first do not yell ah, should let go when you let go, easy not on fire ah!”
When your child is young, he can’t eat, you feed him, you should feed him, you must feed him, you can’t not feed him. But when he grows up, will you still feed him? If you still feed him, either you are stupid, or the child is stupid, or both of you are stupid.
When the child is still small, he can not walk, you hold him or carry him, should ah, must ah. But when he grows up, do you still hold him and carry him? If you still hold him or carry him, unless he is paralyzed. Besides, when he grows up, you become old, you can still hold him and carry him?
It is a failure of education to not raise the child, and to let go when you should. The child suffers, the adult suffers, and is ridiculed, pointed out, and talked about by others.
This is true in life, but isn’t it also true in learning?
When you first enter elementary school, first or second grade, he does not know how to learn, you should teach him, help him, it is appropriate and necessary. But to teach is to not teach, how can not teach? It is to develop good study habits. When the habit is cultivated, he can be conscious, active, independent learning, he is self-sufficient, self-improvement, also have self-confidence, he can “eat” and “walk” by himself, you can also let go.
When it’s time to let go, don’t let go of yourself, and don’t deprive your child of the opportunity to grow in ability. You can still have the necessary help, but you can’t replace everything.
Excessive love is spoiling, and spoiling harms people and themselves. Your intention is certainly not to harm your child, but objectively it will cause harm to your child, and you must have a clear understanding of this.
What you think is fearless sacrifice, what you think is selfless devotion, is actually doing evil. Unnecessary sacrifice, too much to give, but will become the child’s psychological pressure and mental burden.
Is a hundred percent on a test with the help of others a real hundred percent? Is the first place in a test taken with the help of others a real first place? Can a child’s confidence be built on the help of others? Once a dependence on the outside world is formed, it is very difficult to build up his confidence again. Once your help fails to keep up, his world is likely to collapse in an instant.
The success or failure of an educational approach should be judged on a longer-term scale and from a more holistic perspective, rather than solely on the basis of momentary, one-stage achievements. Is a student’s achievement that relies on parents or tutoring classes his own? Can he retain his strengths without his parents and tutors? How far can he go if he is left to his own devices?
Even if the child is quite good in other areas besides grades. But what you see and hear is only the hearsay of others, just a few words, not systematic, not comprehensive, and can not be used as an effective reference for your own child’s training.
Buy practice problems for your child, and buy a set for the adult at the same time, and do it at the same time when the child does it. Before you tutor your child you have to prepare your own lessons, without preparing lessons you are not qualified to tutor. All these measures are running for grades, and people are only able to give their children the necessary help in a timely and scientific manner when they need it. Help that cannot become a substitute.
A person a way of education, not to a person’s way to deny another person, no one can guarantee who’s is right others are wrong, but picking apart the branches and leaves, through the phenomenon to see the essence of the axiom behind believe that we should know: internal factors play a decisive role, external factors only play a supporting role, external factors must play a role through internal factors. Therefore, which way can stimulate the initiative of the child, more play the role of internal factors, which way is relatively more scientific, reasonable, more simple but more successful.
